We headed over to the orphanage this morning and there sitting in a beautiful yellow dress and white hat was Alex’s Babushka (grandma) to say goodbye to him. We were able to witness the Gardniers with their son and their new Grandma. As Bethany put it, they are not taking him away, their family was only growing. It was pretty emotional, but we all know Bethany and John are the parents she had been praying for.
After their goodbyes, we took two cars to the notary’s office. Radzinski’s in one, Gardniers in the other. I told them we would race and of course we won by a mile because our driver Sasha (not our facilitator) is a MADMAN on the roads here. We don’t know how his windshield got smashed and we don’t ask. All seatbelt are secured BEHIND the seat so there is absolutely no chance in hell of putting it on. We are pretty use to his driving because I find myself happy we are passing all the cars to my right as we are driving in the middle of the road where the trolley goes (I figure he must have the schedule memorize because we have not hit one yet)!
After the notary we went back to the apartment to wait (which in our case means naptime) until our doctor’s appointment at the orphanage. We were waiting in the family area when Sergei walked out of a side door and surprised us both! We tried to ask him what was behind the door but we didn’t understand. He ran back to class and we were guessing that it was a bathroom, a timeout room or the janitor’s closet? What do you do in a different country, sitting in an orphanage, trying to be on your best behavior for all the staff who are judging your every move? I will tell you what we did. I open the door to see what was behind it, while I was doing this Kevin yelled out “Boo!” to trying to spook me. Behind this little door is where the orphanage doctor works! So here are the Radzinski’s making a first impression to the orphanage doctor by walking into her office, unannounced, while Kevin is heckling me in the background! Well they didn’t escort us off the premise so it could have been worse…but not by much.
We had our meeting and had our translator/facilitator Sasha, Natalia the assistant director of the orphanage, the medical doctor (who we so rudely interrupted) and the child psychologist. It was a lot of information pretty fast. I had my deer in headlights eyes on but at the end of it all…it is nothing our family can’t work through. Everyone sitting around that table loves our boys. The child psychologist was so warm and kind I want to bring her home in my suitcase. The boy’s mother is alive but we are not allowed to contact her, period. There is a half-sister who is 18 who the boys have never met. She has the same mother but a different father. The sister has always lived with her father and is in good care.
Max is our big concern right now. Sergei has been to the USA, has stayed in our home and knows how much we love him. He will be in court, he decides if he wants this adoption to happen. I believe and pray that having the final say will empower him and help him with many of the post-adoption issues and feelings he is going to be facing. Max is about to be thrown into tornado and he doesn’t even know it yet. After the doctor’s review and just being with him over this last week, we have learned so much and realize we are going to have to start at the VERY beginning for him. He was a preemie and is a little fighter so we know he can do this! Our first goal, ahead of school and speech, is attachment. All the books on attachment state how important eye-contact is especially left eye to left eye. Want to hear something awesome? My left eye has a broken blood vessel so I look like a crazy-scary lady!
These boys have been to hell and back and we will strive to do EVERYTHING in our power to protect them, love them, guide them, cry with them and love them with all that we have. Our adoption journey began 9 months ago but I think the hard part is just about to start, bring it on. I just want to do it on US soil.
